Did I have some kind of a behavioural problem as a child which anyone recognises?

I don't think you had oppositional defiant disorder either. I would guess that you were just angry as a child, and that is understandable. Your mom did the very best she could as a parent, but her being bi-polar had to affect you. Somewhere deep inside you are probably still angry. It's normal to feel angry. You are using that anger in a positive way, with your volunteer work. I use mine as a special ed teacher to advocate for my students. I grew up in a home where, like you, I was loved and not abused, but issues that my parents had made me angry. I was argumentative and contrary too. You know the nursery rhyme about the "little girl with a little curl right in the middle of her forehead"? Mom said that was my poem. Also, "Mary, Mary quite contrary." Dad said if he said the sky was blue I would argue. That made me mad, but really he was right. I also hated feeling manipulated and still have a problem with power and wanting to be in control. I hated being told what to do. I was suspicious of praise. Some of my anger came out in different ways than yours, but I really relate to all of the feelings you describe. Anger was a feeling that was acceptable for me and it was kind of my role in the family to be angry. I very rarely got in trouble at school too. As a teenager I felt kind of like I had to take care of my mother. When my daughters were young I decided to get counseling so that I could be the best mother I could be for them. I loved them and did not lose my temper. I was a good mom, but I knew I could be better. It felt like something was missing. And I knew I didn't feel normal inside, even though I acted totally normal. So I got counseling from this really great psychologist and it changed my life. I became happier than ever in my life and I learned to love myself, even that angry little child who is still in there. I realized that my anger was the way I protected myself from the craziness and inconsistency of my life as a child. My daughters are in their 20's now and do not have any of the issues I had and sometimes still have. What you decide to do is, of course, totally up to you. And counseling may not be the answer for you. I just wanted you to know that there was another kid that felt like you did.